Spanish Dolphins v. German Manatees

We've all heard a lot about busted ear drum drugs this past week and I for one have learned something. Kev gets excited about pills! Mail has been pouring in with well wishes for Kevlar's auditory cavity. One FAQ that keeps coming up; is it "thersher" or "thresher"? Well, I did some research and it's definitely "thresher", not "thersher". Longtime readers are aware that we don't read Kev for the spelling, in fact, reading Kev wouldn't be Kevlar if the spelling were always parfait. So there. And also the "e" key and "r" key are like right next to each other, so, ya know.

I found this vid of a couple of thresher sharks.

I've sometimes been accused of living in the past. Today is no different

Since I always do things like two weeks late anyway...

This conversation was recorded on my phone not long after Kev's return from the Philippines.

"Hey Ry."

"Hey yer back."

"Hunh. Wait lemme switch ears. I'm deaf."

"Deaf?"

"Yeah got back last night."

"For the record, you went alone, right?"

"Yeaaah. Popped an ear drum diving. Hurts like a mother."

"Bummer. Aaron couldn't believe you got away with a solo trip. I figured that if you were drinking with PJ all night there was no way you had your girls with you."

"They would've needed visas."

"Right. Good excuse. How did you get Anne to agree to let you go? For how long? A week?"

"It was her idea. She said I should go."

"But her idea was Singapore, not Cebu."

"Yeah."

"So you actually won an argument with your wife?"

"Oh puh-lease, I tell that bitch what's up."

"Listen to you."

"Oh yeah."

"So you went drinking with PJ?"

"Well, he was on my plane and when it landed he said Hey Kev, a bunch of us are organizing a trip to this bar, wanna come?"

"You went."

"I went to that bar later. He was holding court. He drinks there all night so he doesn't have to pay for a room."

"If he didn't drink he could probably afford one."

"Yeah, right. Would you?"

"Not drink?"

"Yeah."

"No."

"He says he gets a room for a couple of hours if he feels tired."

"So you guys hung out for awhile?"

"Just that night. I kinda tried to avoid him cause, you know, he's crazy. I left for Malapascua next day."

"So other than going deaf, how was the diving?"

"I saw these thresher sharks. Their tails are longer than their bodies! I dove 15 Meters with some Spanish dolphins then through a tunnel. At the end of the tunnel were the sharks swimming around."

"Spanish dolphins?"

"Spaniards. They swam like dolphins. I call them dolphins. Got to use a flashlight in the tunnel, cause it was, you know, dark."

"Really."

"Yeah. It turned out to be good practice for me cause I did a night dive later."

"How was that?"

"Really dark. I had to listen for the dive master's clink-clink on his tank but because I was deaf I couldn't always tell where he was. You had to shine your flashlight wherever you wanted to look but there were these damn German manatees that were always in my way of what i wanted to look at."

"German manatees?"

"Big ass Germans. With video cameras. Shooting the cool stuff. I'd like to try it again. Without the giant Germans there. I wish the dolphins had been there."

"You stayed the whole time on that island?"

"Yeah. 30 Peso beers. I think that I wouldn't have stayed so long if I hadn't been so drunk."

"Make any friends?"

"I saw a lot of people from Taichung down there. Didn't know any of them though. I tagged along with a couple for a bit. She was from Hong Kong and he was Canadian. They were weird."

"How so?"

"They split everything. Money I mean. Some weirdo Dutch thing going on where they'd have lunch or get off the bus or something and he'd say she'd say you owe me 17 Pesos cause you had the Fanta and I just had water type of thing you know?"

"Maybe they're a new couple."

"Four years! You know nowhere in the Philippines takes traveller's cheques!"

"Geez. What'd you do for money?"

"I managed. It wasn't easy."

"Did you get in any, um, extra curricular activities?"

"No. Couldn't, ahem, afford it. Too drunk."

"Right."

"No, really."

"I said right."

"I think maybe I drank too much."

"Well, blog some pics with all that free time you're gonna have in Miaoli for the rest of the vacation. I gotta go."

"Oh! I'm never gonna have free time again!"

"What do you mean?"

"Anne."

"Thought you told her what was what, bi-atch."

"I can hear it now. Gawd!"

"Maybe she can massage your ear drum for you."

"Yeeha."

"Get some Mah-jonng video instead of tractors this year, will ya?"

"Ya I'll get on that one."

"Like a dolphin."

"Like a dolphin."

"Not a narwhal. Cause that would hurt."