shits and giggles

I didn't watch much of the Olympics except for some diving.
I got this email...
These may or may not be actual quotes from the Olympics.

Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators
during the Olympics that they would probably like to take back:

1. Weight-lifting commentator: 'This is Gregorieva from Bulgaria. I saw
her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing.'

2. Dressage commentator: 'This is really a lovely horse and I speak from
personal experience since I once mounted her mother.'

3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: 'I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother
and father.'

4. Boxing Analyst: 'Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in
boxing, but none of them really that serious.'

5. Softball announcer: 'If history repeats itself, I should think we can
expect the same thing again.'

6. Basketball analyst: 'He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like
it. In fact you can see it all over their faces.'

7. At the rowing medal ceremony: 'Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC
president is hugging the cox of the British crew.'

8. Soccer commentator: 'Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got
eleven Dicks on the field.'

9. Tennis commentator: 'One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is
that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses
them... Oh my God, what have I just said?'