Wednesday, February 20

Spanish Dolphins v. German Manatees

We've all heard a lot about busted ear drum drugs this past week and I for one have learned something. Kev gets excited about pills! Mail has been pouring in with well wishes for Kevlar's auditory cavity. One FAQ that keeps coming up; is it "thersher" or "thresher"? Well, I did some research and it's definitely "thresher", not "thersher". Longtime readers are aware that we don't read Kev for the spelling, in fact, reading Kev wouldn't be Kevlar if the spelling were always parfait. So there. And also the "e" key and "r" key are like right next to each other, so, ya know.

I found this vid of a couple of thresher sharks.

I've sometimes been accused of living in the past. Today is no different

Since I always do things like two weeks late anyway...

This conversation was recorded on my phone not long after Kev's return from the Philippines.

"Hey Ry."

"Hey yer back."

"Hunh. Wait lemme switch ears. I'm deaf."

"Deaf?"

"Yeah got back last night."

"For the record, you went alone, right?"

"Yeaaah. Popped an ear drum diving. Hurts like a mother."

"Bummer. Aaron couldn't believe you got away with a solo trip. I figured that if you were drinking with PJ all night there was no way you had your girls with you."

"They would've needed visas."

"Right. Good excuse. How did you get Anne to agree to let you go? For how long? A week?"

"It was her idea. She said I should go."

"But her idea was Singapore, not Cebu."

"Yeah."

"So you actually won an argument with your wife?"

"Oh puh-lease, I tell that bitch what's up."

"Listen to you."

"Oh yeah."

"So you went drinking with PJ?"

"Well, he was on my plane and when it landed he said Hey Kev, a bunch of us are organizing a trip to this bar, wanna come?"

"You went."

"I went to that bar later. He was holding court. He drinks there all night so he doesn't have to pay for a room."

"If he didn't drink he could probably afford one."

"Yeah, right. Would you?"

"Not drink?"

"Yeah."

"No."

"He says he gets a room for a couple of hours if he feels tired."

"So you guys hung out for awhile?"

"Just that night. I kinda tried to avoid him cause, you know, he's crazy. I left for Malapascua next day."

"So other than going deaf, how was the diving?"

"I saw these thresher sharks. Their tails are longer than their bodies! I dove 15 Meters with some Spanish dolphins then through a tunnel. At the end of the tunnel were the sharks swimming around."

"Spanish dolphins?"

"Spaniards. They swam like dolphins. I call them dolphins. Got to use a flashlight in the tunnel, cause it was, you know, dark."

"Really."

"Yeah. It turned out to be good practice for me cause I did a night dive later."

"How was that?"

"Really dark. I had to listen for the dive master's clink-clink on his tank but because I was deaf I couldn't always tell where he was. You had to shine your flashlight wherever you wanted to look but there were these damn German manatees that were always in my way of what i wanted to look at."

"German manatees?"

"Big ass Germans. With video cameras. Shooting the cool stuff. I'd like to try it again. Without the giant Germans there. I wish the dolphins had been there."

"You stayed the whole time on that island?"

"Yeah. 30 Peso beers. I think that I wouldn't have stayed so long if I hadn't been so drunk."

"Make any friends?"

"I saw a lot of people from Taichung down there. Didn't know any of them though. I tagged along with a couple for a bit. She was from Hong Kong and he was Canadian. They were weird."

"How so?"

"They split everything. Money I mean. Some weirdo Dutch thing going on where they'd have lunch or get off the bus or something and he'd say she'd say you owe me 17 Pesos cause you had the Fanta and I just had water type of thing you know?"

"Maybe they're a new couple."

"Four years! You know nowhere in the Philippines takes traveller's cheques!"

"Geez. What'd you do for money?"

"I managed. It wasn't easy."

"Did you get in any, um, extra curricular activities?"

"No. Couldn't, ahem, afford it. Too drunk."

"Right."

"No, really."

"I said right."

"I think maybe I drank too much."

"Well, blog some pics with all that free time you're gonna have in Miaoli for the rest of the vacation. I gotta go."

"Oh! I'm never gonna have free time again!"

"What do you mean?"

"Anne."

"Thought you told her what was what, bi-atch."

"I can hear it now. Gawd!"

"Maybe she can massage your ear drum for you."

"Yeeha."

"Get some Mah-jonng video instead of tractors this year, will ya?"

"Ya I'll get on that one."

"Like a dolphin."

"Like a dolphin."

"Not a narwhal. Cause that would hurt."

Tuesday, February 19

The Philipina


Well passing the time in Cebu I sat on a Jeepney going to the SM Mall. The girl next to me. Went to Saudi to be an electronics technician, then to Taiwan... and today she leaves for Dartmouth, Nova Scotia to work for a company called Suncell or solar cell. I offered to switch places with her. She declined, she just wanted to hear about what the city was like.
The woman and other people I spoke to.. don't own a computer. Kinda weird when a computer is a luxury item. I can't remember a day when I didn't use a computer.

The DutchMan


He lives with his girlfriend six months a year in the Philipines. The rest of the time he sells, and rents inflatables in Holland. (toys, Michelen Man..)
Really friendly guy, he took me on my refresher dive. I saw lion fish, coral and a sucker fish. The sucker fish swam around and around trying to attach itself to some part of me.

Sunday, February 17

The Brit



Steve Jones gave up teaching French in 1992 and now researches, writes and publishes for his company, Wicked Publications Limited. The first book London... The Sinister Side has sold over 100,000 copies in England and Japan. Twelve further, heavily illustrated books, mostly on social history and true crime, have been very well received. Steve, a Charlton Athletic fanatic, lives in Nottingham with his wife and baby son.

We chatted and he went on and on about the ignorance of Americans who never travel. He hitchhiked across the USA in 1972. That is when the friendly Canadian diver started talking about his travels across Canada in '71.
I told him I live in Taiwan, and I had been to Korea. And he commented with "God you have lived in some awful places".
He just granted the publication rights to one of his books to a Chinese company. They want to possibly use it to do ESL. Apparently "The Chinese are very interested in anything about London". I had to tell him Chinese people like to read he might do well with the translated publication.
He was a little excited and then we went on to talk about
"Other things Philipines" It was pretty interesting.
He mentioned how he made his books, I think it might be right up Ry's alley.

Thursday, February 14

The Swede

Just because "he doesn't speak English very well", does not mean I won't make an effort to speak to him.
The bar was empty except for a thin Santa Claus and a sharp waitress.
He is a thin quiet looking, chainsmoking, San Miguel tipping, older guy. He had been in the Philipines on Malapascua Island for 50 days. It is his third visit to the island and he loves it.
Sweden is cold,wet and crowded. "Why would I stay there?" I own my own company "People think I am crazy for working". He looks about 70. He comes from a family of 8 and they are very close. He likes dogs and German Shepards are popular in Sweden. He owns 4 tractor trailers and several smaller trucks and he delievers parcels throughout Stockholm. He likes to work "I gotta to do something, I can't just sit here", as he (points to the newly arrived San Miguel and reaches for more cigarettes).
His bushy thick white beard was not a distraction, the sharp waitress was available to tease. Boy was I on my game. The Swede, the waitress and the Cannuck were having some real laughs. More of the new beer "Conversation-Ez" was ordered.
Diving blew through the conversation and fishing came up. I was supposed to get up at 4:30 and the Swede was to get up at 6. He was going fishing "I got to do something, I can't can't just sit here and (motions a finger at the new bottle).
We chit and chat, I take 5 minutes to talk about the weather and everything I ever heard about Sweden. He then tells me about giving coins to the island children every morning, fishing and catching nothing, over paying happily for everything. Buying his boatman, large bags of rice, bicycles for children, Tipping plenty, taking some pictures and enjoying the warm weather.
Quietly wondering about how to get a little special company from Manilla to pass the time. Popping out to the store for a packet of cigarettes. What cigarettes cost here and what they cost in Krona?(the basic monetary unit of Sweden). The offering of the hand of a fisherman's daughter (I think he may have turned down the cookie)
Some tequilla shots later, more people arrived and that would be a different post.

Wednesday, February 13

Mark and Satara

Day one met these two.
They split all costs on the spot. They live together and are a traveling couple. THEY have been to Vietnam, and Hong Kong, together. They decided to split costs because there would be "unfair expenses" because she likes to eat seafood (which is more expensive).
They bickered that "his friend" paid for his girlfriend to fly to England.

They were ok for a little while, but soon they were hinting. something about wanting to use the bathroom in my 1000 pesso a night shack, cause the 300 pesso didn't have lights and water. Wanting to use my phone to call Taiwan.. cause theirs was not working.. which I suggested they get it to work. That they could purchase a "Load" for their phones.
They seemed to bring too much baggage from Taiwan, they were trying to get a hold of their friend to meet them and bring them 40000 pessos because the exchange rate was better... blah blah. I think their friend went to Bohol instead.

Come on!! Dual income traveling couple dropping 36000 to get their open water dive and nickel and diming. They even walked out of a bar on the tab. I didn't pick it up but I just met the other couple who did. The new couple thought it was ok.

I knew it was time to cut them loose when I asked them if they wanted to get a boat and go snorkeling. They said yes. But first they had to change some money, then they told the boat guy they were going with another guy, then they had to change their clothes, then blah blah and they suddenly didn't feel like going because 500 pessos divided by 3 people was too much. I then had to go find the first boat guy I spoke to (cause there was never another guy). This took me 45 minutes. I was kinda pissed. Fellas if you didn't want to snorkel say "no thanks" and do not say "Oh yeah that will be fun" and then waste precious moments of my vacation time. I went alone, saw fish, a pile of Koreans snorkeling with life jackets.

I got to have some fun.

Tuesday, February 12

Ear Quality Update

After probing the inner contents of my nose with a tiny camera on a black whip-like wand. The doctor sent me to a booth for a hearing test. Following a pressure test it was determined there was no nerve damage. My right eardrum is intact and has surface bubbles. My difficulty in hearing is the imbalance of pressure in both my ears. I then filled my prescription for oral decongestants. Since taking these new pills my ears have been popping every hour. The doctor says my hearing will be fine once the pressure has balanced. He suggested I continue to clear my ears by pinching my nose and blowing gently.
First visit cost me 720nt, second visit cost me 480nt... That's 1200 nt on pills.

I spoke with two doctors on the first visit. The second visit had three technicians and two different doctors. I bounced around enough to get one prognosis, I wonder how easy it would be to get a second opinion. I think in the end I could have put more effort into equalizing my ears and my hearing would have recovered just as quickly.

Sunday, February 10

Ear Infection

My deafness led me to the hospital. The doctors were helpfully and gave me plenty of pills. On good faith I took them. Since then I had a few minutes were my hearing worked and my ear is not swollen. Here is what I am on.
Drug Augmentin 1g
Augmentin is an antibiotic in a group of drugs called penicillins. Augmentin fights bacteria in the body.

Augmentin is used to treat many different infections caused by bacteria, such as sinusitis, pneumonia, ear infections, bronchitis, urinary tract infections, and infections of the skin.
Portions sold:
Augmentin suspension 125,200, 250,400,600 mg per 5 ml I am on the
Augmentin XR 1000mg because my ears are really big and sick.Augmentin should be taken every 8 or 12 hours, depending on the dosage strength.
Ok so they got me on the XR 1000 two times a day.

Cataflam 25mg diclofenac pot.
CATAFLAM is a powerful medicine for the relief of acute painful and inflammatory conditions. Each CATAFLAM tablet contains 25mg of diclofenac potassium
relieves pain: Sprains and Strains, Bruises Neck Pain, Back Pain Period Pains
Migraine Headaches, Post Operative Pain (e.g. Minor Surgery)
Initially take 2 tablets, then if necessary take 1 or 2 tablets every 8 hours. My instructions say take one pill every six hours

Mucaine Tab
For the treatment of chronic oesophagitis without stricture, chronic gastritis, peptic ulcer, the irritable bowel syndrome and heartburn of pregnancy.

Symptoms of oesophageal or gastric irritation are usually relieved in patients who do not respond to antacid therapy.
The recommended adult dose is 2 to 4 tablets four times daily 15 minutes before meals and at bedtime.
The doctor gave me the right dossage for the last pill. It is recomended because the strength of the other pills will upset my stomach

Well after learning a little about these pills I feel sick.

Friday, February 8

The Night Dive


The Mandarin fish looked huge in the dive shop book. I was really keen to go see some of these colorful critters. Well they are something like 6cm long and they seem to do a lot of mating.
Diving with flashlights is disorientating. Six light sabers cutting through the dark water and the dive master clinking away on his tank. Click click click come look at this, not there.. here.. come to this light.
It was go practice for the tunnel dive.
I only wish the German with the video camera wasn't infront of the ocean nightlife.

Thersher Shark

What I saw looked bigger than this.. in my 50 minute dive my group did a lot of commando style crawling for 50 minutes at 22m. I saw plankton, tiny insect like shrimp, and a pile of fish before 7am. I finished with 40bars and when my head broke the surface my left ear made a sound like sticking your head out a car window at 100kmph. I now have an ear infection, anti-biotics, deafness and a desire to dive in Taiwan some weekend.

Shark video

Gato Island tunnel to the sharks. 50m swim at a depth of about 8-10 metres. This the tunnel exit. It is pretty cool because of the number of fish and the sharks. I saw three sharks, apparently they are circling in a current. Lying on the bottom watching them was pretty exciting.



I would say the group I was with were a little closer to the exit and the sharks varied in size. The sharks also stayed around for a couple of minutes.

Smoking lounge at CKS

















The future of smoking.. or smoking in the future...

Island Traffic

Island traffic haulted by a gaggle of turkeys. Tourists were over heard bribing children to build sand castles for loose change.
This was one of the main thorough fares on the island with one car.

Cebu City




Bon Jovi is still alive and well in the Philipines.
This was a random shot on the way to the airport. I didn't take many pictures and I can't get this computer to open some files.

Wednesday, February 6

"Bud Light. I'm Horny"

We watched the Superbowl on CTV at Fubar so we didn't see those ads the announcers kept encouraging us to check out at myspace.com.

"Want to see your favorite Superbowl commercial again? Be sure to log onto..."

In our heightened states of drunkeness we laughed at and derided such stupid suggestions as pure capitalist smegma...

And I would not normally go in for this shit but

this one, however, is pretty freakin funny..

Will Ferrell as Jackie Moon for Bud Light -

Best Sneer

JW Kaleidoscope

John Air Smoking

JW tells everyone about the preemo weed he had the other night.

Tuesday, February 5

"Who ate all the gabagoo?"

What if Sopranos aired on PAX TV?

I've been trying to imagine what a conversation between Kevlar and PJ in Cebu may have sounded like but I haven't quite hit the right notes yet. I'll keep thinking.

In the meantime here's some more viewing for the conspiracy minded -

ZEITGEIST, THE MOVIE

Sunday, February 3

Cuckolded

Apparently Sarah Silverman is fucking Matt Damon.

Too bad for Jimmy Kimmel.

Double Decker Merry Go Round

You can see Sandy and Ivo on top at the very end of the vid.

Groundhog Day Conspiracy

I was looking for Groundhog Day (the movie) clips yesterday and came across this video that points to the presence of soldiers and police working together at crowd control during the annual Punxsutawney Phil Groundhog Day festivities.

The maker of the video stresses the violation of the 1878 Posse Comitatus Act prohibiting the Army from acting as local law enforcement. Why? It's of course an insidious attempt to subliminally condition Americans to get used to the idea of a military presence on the streets. The police state cometh! And, coincidentally or not, the film was released just 2 weeks prior to the 1993 WTC bombing. Go figure. Maybe he's just paranoid but why indeed is the Army at a Festival celebrating the possible emergence of a rodent from a hole? Maybe Harold Ramis would know.



Part 2 (10 minutes of the reporter badgering a Texas cop about why the Army is searching a bus off I-35) is footage of Army personnel working with cops but covering their faces in public so they won't be filmed.

Also...

If you're like me and the only reason you go to Taipei 101 is for the kick ass bookstore, consider it dead. The Page One bookstore on the 4th floor has been essentially cut in half. Walled up. Not nearly the selection they had before. It sucked balls. Except for the kids' section. That's still not too bad. However, They should change the name to Paragraph One. It's still better than Caves but not by much and definitely not worth a special trip.

Taipei Report


We took the HSR to Taipei on Monday. With stops at Hsinchu, Taoyuan and Banqiao it took 70 minutes. The return trip on Wednesday only stopped at Banqiao. Travel time was 50 minutes. Very impressive. Loved Taipei. Love the sidewalks. MRT is awesome.
We took the boys to the Taipei Children's Recreation Area between the Jiantan and Yuanshan stops, within sight of the Grand Hotel. Excellent little amusement park. Ferris Wheel, TRAIN (Ivo's Fav), Teacups, Tilt-A-Whirl, Bumper Cars, Double Decker Merry Go Round. Boys had a fantastic time...